PC – Yes, you did. I cannot fathom the mindset
of someone who could or would say such a thing
to a child. You did the best thing possible for
yourself in cutting yourself off from that abusive
relationship. But, if possible, try to forgive. Not
for him, but for yourself. Your anger at him does
him no harm, but can and will harm you. He’s not
worth the effort.
Your fine PC, I’ve been there, Only it was my half-sister and mother.
Just please, don’t be afraid to talk to us, you have a family here now.
And you always will.
Like Scars said, “we’re here.
My life was much better, mother father and brother.
I have two kids and 3 grand kids. We all talk.
Look after yourself better, we need you as well.
Just do like I did, picture something outlandish and try not
to bust out laughing, Like miniature donkeys wearing a
yellow paisley sundress riding ostriches with black go-go
boots running in a horse race setting…
Yes, yes, I need medications… 😛
I’ve experienced the mental torture of a mentally ill parent.
It took most of my life to come to grips with it and escape the influence they had on me.
As Scars said, we can talk here.
I’m sorry to hear, that does describe my mother,
She convinced herself that somehow I was her
ex’s kid and treated me like it, even though I came
along 2 years after she married my father. PTSD
does things to a person.
it seems ‘our age’ put us in a same boat.! your family (PC, tho i had 2 sisters) and Scars life…
and you have my life.! my S-D kept beating me into a mold / clone of him… i could not do any
better than him.! .. after his funeral, we found out he had many kids ,, 7 that we know of, and
4 that we didn’t,. showed to the funeral, 6 called that could not make it. (all different moms…)
he accused mom of sleeping around, even tho she had 4 kids, total,. us 3 by him,. and one
after she bailed and remarried… so,,, she had 4, while married, and his 20+ kids only 3.!!
also, i told the wife, “IF any show up and claim to be ‘my family’. Shoot thru the door.!”
… if you want talk / rant / soapbox. WE will be here.!! and like i told Scars, you Have my
number CALL, if you need to talk.!! (any of you.!)
“I would rather, listen for hours! than read about you, on the back page.!!!”
Once again you all remind me of the relatively sheltered life I have
led, although it didn’t feel like it at the time. My father was a piece
of work in ways, but there was a lot in him to admire and try to live
up to as well. I have the bit I wrote to read at his funeral last year.
It starts with the theme, choose what is worth remembering, worth
dwelling on. If you can find -anything- worth admiring, try your best
to put that at the forefront, and if you can’t, then accept that you
have examples of things to guard against emulating. I have both.
Petercat –
It does this old soldier’s heart good to see you have discovered the “Dash 10” (Operator’s Manual) for “Illegitimi non carborundum”.
While I am sorry you experienced all that – I see you not only persevered, you overcame!
ned
Amen to what Rob said.
This sounds somewhat similar to what my spouse had said of my father-in-law; there was no love lost there.
I do agree that you should *enjoy yourself* with the story; have fun, scheme, plot, snicker to yourself and then inflict horrible puns upon us if need be; somehow I suspect that it would still be quite a good pair of stories. 8{)}
I am lucky to never experienced something like that. I had my problems with my brother and mother but we see each other occasionally. My dad is 92 now, mom 87. I also think kindly of neighbors in general. Few years ago there was unusual much snow and i could not make it to my parents to clear the driveway. A man from the neighborhood did it. And my parents did not even know him.
Be careful what you say to the young. It sticks.
But I outlived all of the bastards. That’s something, I guess.
Not wanting pity, just understanding.
Of where I am and why.
PC – Yes, you did. I cannot fathom the mindset
of someone who could or would say such a thing
to a child. You did the best thing possible for
yourself in cutting yourself off from that abusive
relationship. But, if possible, try to forgive. Not
for him, but for yourself. Your anger at him does
him no harm, but can and will harm you. He’s not
worth the effort.
Oops. The “Yes, you did.” was in response to the “But
I outlived all of the bastards.” in the first post.
Your fine PC, I’ve been there, Only it was my half-sister and mother.
Just please, don’t be afraid to talk to us, you have a family here now.
And you always will.
Thank you. That means a lot.
Like Scars said, “we’re here.
My life was much better, mother father and brother.
I have two kids and 3 grand kids. We all talk.
Look after yourself better, we need you as well.
Just do like I did, picture something outlandish and try not
to bust out laughing, Like miniature donkeys wearing a
yellow paisley sundress riding ostriches with black go-go
boots running in a horse race setting…
Yes, yes, I need medications… 😛
I’ve experienced the mental torture of a mentally ill parent.
It took most of my life to come to grips with it and escape the influence they had on me.
As Scars said, we can talk here.
I’m sorry to hear, that does describe my mother,
She convinced herself that somehow I was her
ex’s kid and treated me like it, even though I came
along 2 years after she married my father. PTSD
does things to a person.
Hang in there, Petercat.
(i’ve stopped calling both my brothers, brothers. They each managed to kill such thoughts. Easily)
And now for something COMPLETELY different:
https://www.youtube.com/shorts/VRlWZuatU_U
🙂 😀
As Paul Harvey used to say “And now, the REST of the story”
it seems ‘our age’ put us in a same boat.! your family (PC, tho i had 2 sisters) and Scars life…
and you have my life.! my S-D kept beating me into a mold / clone of him… i could not do any
better than him.! .. after his funeral, we found out he had many kids ,, 7 that we know of, and
4 that we didn’t,. showed to the funeral, 6 called that could not make it. (all different moms…)
he accused mom of sleeping around, even tho she had 4 kids, total,. us 3 by him,. and one
after she bailed and remarried… so,,, she had 4, while married, and his 20+ kids only 3.!!
also, i told the wife, “IF any show up and claim to be ‘my family’. Shoot thru the door.!”
… if you want talk / rant / soapbox. WE will be here.!! and like i told Scars, you Have my
number CALL, if you need to talk.!! (any of you.!)
“I would rather, listen for hours! than read about you, on the back page.!!!”
I will Rob, I’m not there yet, but soon
if the nightmares get worse. I laid down
to take a nap and woke up 6 hours later?!?
Once again you all remind me of the relatively sheltered life I have
led, although it didn’t feel like it at the time. My father was a piece
of work in ways, but there was a lot in him to admire and try to live
up to as well. I have the bit I wrote to read at his funeral last year.
It starts with the theme, choose what is worth remembering, worth
dwelling on. If you can find -anything- worth admiring, try your best
to put that at the forefront, and if you can’t, then accept that you
have examples of things to guard against emulating. I have both.
Petercat –
It does this old soldier’s heart good to see you have discovered the “Dash 10” (Operator’s Manual) for “Illegitimi non carborundum”.
While I am sorry you experienced all that – I see you not only persevered, you overcame!
ned
Amen to what Rob said.
This sounds somewhat similar to what my spouse had said of my father-in-law; there was no love lost there.
I do agree that you should *enjoy yourself* with the story; have fun, scheme, plot, snicker to yourself and then inflict horrible puns upon us if need be; somehow I suspect that it would still be quite a good pair of stories. 8{)}
I am lucky to never experienced something like that. I had my problems with my brother and mother but we see each other occasionally. My dad is 92 now, mom 87. I also think kindly of neighbors in general. Few years ago there was unusual much snow and i could not make it to my parents to clear the driveway. A man from the neighborhood did it. And my parents did not even know him.